Toluu

The Leveraged Sell-Out

Living the dream...

What’s News SectionOctober 21 2008

A What’s News section has been released below, but its posts will not be included in the main RSS feed or email notifications. You can subscribe to its specific feed here.

Remember The TitansOctober 16 2008

I think what I’m going to miss most is the elitism.

Though I’ve never worked in finance, for the past three years, I have been exploring the culture of young investment bankers on this website. Through a mix of fake articles and first and third person stories, I’ve attempted to bring light to topics ranging from the “glamorous,” nightlife and fashion, to the geeky, obsessive attention to detail and technical wizardry in Excel. The responses I’ve received and the comments left here have often offered even deeper insight into the psyche of the young banker / wannabe banker, and they’ve illustrated that one sentiment resonated more than any other: elitism.

What others don’t realize is that at the junior levels, everyone in banking makes relatively the same amount of money, and as such, bankers cling to an intricate hierarchy devised to rank institutions, groups within institutions, and individuals within those groups.

This site has seen comments (taken verbatim), like:

“Hey Wachovia bankers, what are you guys going to spend your $600 economic stimulus checks on?”

And polls:

Which would you rather be?

Benefit CrashersSeptember 17 2008

(New York, NY)

Earlier this week at a mid-sized private equity firm, Jeremy walked into Gopal’s office and slapped a printout down on his keyboard, disrupting an intense modeling session.

“What the fuck, son?” Gopal reacted, irritated, hastily Ctrl-Z’ing.

Jeremy stood in front of Gopal, motioning eagerly with his eyes and chin down to the piece of paper he’d just presented. Gopal stared at him, infuriated, but Jeremy continued—up and down until Gopal finally gave in and picked it up.

It was a flyer, Fall-themed, with illustrated leaves of changing color and martini glasses. The headline read: “Emerging | Education | Equality - E3 Fall Benefit at Marquee on Sept. 19th.”

Gopal looked up from the flyer to see Jeremy smiling ear to ear, enthusiastically. Jeremy had already started bobbing his head to an imaginary beat and was bursting, just waiting for Gopal to react and share in his excitement.

And after a moment, Gopal did respond: “Are you fucking kidding me right now?”

Jeremy recoiled, stung and perplexed by the unfounded rejection. This was the second life-changing, Western proposal to which his backwards Indian friend had responded with disbelief and denial. The first was Ch

The FaceoffAugust 28 2008

ExcerptJuly 31 2008

A short excerpt from Damn It Feels Good To Be A Banker is up at Radar. An additional excerpt will be sent to the mailing list on August 5th.