Toluu

The Random Ramblings of a Midtown Miscreant

Playing the card................January 7

This is a very sad case,” Gallagher told the newspaper. “I think it is particularly tragic that this girl had so little support that she wasn’t able to recognize any other option than what happened.” This pearl of wisdom and compassion comes from Port Angeles Washington Police Chief Gallagher who was commenting on the arrest of a 16 year old girl who " “put her baby face down into a toilet and allowed it to drown for several minutes until it died. Then she threw her son into the trash can outside in a plastic garbage bag.” They also popped her father for Meth and Felon in Possession of a firearm, but back to the statement made by the Chief. There is a common thread that repeats itself from time to time in the media when some young kid commits some incomprehensible crime. People want to give them a pass, remove accountability for their actions and lay it at the foot of the piss poor parent, or society, or poverty, or race, or any one of a countless litany of excuses.

Unlike Chief Gallagher I think it's particularly tragic that this he

When good parents go stupid.January 6

A small group of parents in JoCo stood outside a middle school yesterday protesting after district leaders suddenly told their children not to report for class Monday. The best I can decipher it, the kids were in a special needs school and were told they would be going to the regular school, due to an unforeseen high enrollment the parents were told the kids wouldn't be able to attend that school. The parents are pissed, which is a reasonable reaction, so they decided to protest. Someone told the local news stations who came ready with cameras, filmed the protest and stuck it on the news. So far so good right? Wrong. The parents in their infinite wisdom decided to bring at least a couple of the kids along to hold signs while school buses drove past them and the cameras filmed them. I'd like to be the first to congratulate these chowder heads for ensuring that their children will be ostracised, singled out, and ridiculed . Unless JoCo kids are somehow less

Breaking News ! ! ! ! Idaho Russet Potatoes are on sale!!!January 5

I don't recall who coined this phrase about Kansas City, in fact I can't even quote it verbatim but it goes something like "The city with the small town feeling" or some such shit. If you tell someone on the east or west coast you are from Kansas City, you will get the obligatory Dorothy and Toto reference. Even people who hail from KC like to refer to it as a cow town. I generally take exception to that kind of talk, but it's hard to argue the point when the biggest news story O the Day is the opening of a grocery store, or a waiter getting a big tip. Fox 4 has been reporting the grand opening of a downtown grocery store for the past month. With the grand opening taking place tomorrow Fox 4 has run the downtown grocery store piece a dozen times since last night. They did a man on the street interview with some guy who said it was about time they put a grocery store in the downtown area, the 5 minute drive to a midtown grocery was just too arduous. Not to mention he might be accosted by some crazy midtown wino bumming change or asking for a smoke.

My point in all of this is a trend that seems to be taking over of late. The local m

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. A Prison Story.January 2

He is standing in the chow line. A small framed , twenty something black guy. He is wearing his clothes backwards. His coat, his shirt, his pants, all backwards. The only thing pointed in the right direction are his shoes. The thing I found odd, even more than his 180 degree apparel is that not a single guard seemed to notice. He steps up to the serving line, they slap spoons and ladles full of starch laden prison food on his tray, the guy in line behind Mr. Ass Backwards gives him his three feet and then some. He manages to make it to a table, sits down, then just stares off in to space.

I'm sitting a few tables directly behind him, every prisoner in the chow hall is focused on the guy. Everyone just knows something is going to happen, the anticipation on their faces, waiting for something out of the ordinary to break the monotony of another day filled with instant mashed potatoes, mystery meat, and sameness. One of the guards finally notice the guy is clearly not dressed to code. He nudges a couple of the other hacks and they approach the table. I can't tell what they are saying to him, but the biggest of the three is leaning down in to the guys ear. I'm pretty sure he is saying something like " You are in violation of rule number something or another".

By now the chow hall has gone dead quiet, everyone is watching it unfold, something in the air tells you that something is going to happen. The big hack reaches down to take the guys tray, the other two

New Year resolutions and non-change you can believe in.December 30 2008

I expect the Internet will be deluged with year end wrap ups, new year resolutions, the obligatory "what I'm thankful for" posts, not that there is anything wrong with that. Okay, there are a few things wrong with that, at least where most of us are concerned. New Year resolutions are the little white lies we like to tell ourselves. I'm going to quit smoking, I'm gonna lose weight and keep it off, I'm going to release my neighbor from that hole I dug in the basement and just buy a normal lamp shade like everyone else, the usual shit. Maybe you are one of the rare people who actually follow through on your resolutions, if so, fuckin bully for you.


I'm a slow learner, I always have been. The things that most of us are supposed to figure out in our teens, I finally caught on to in my 30's, or 40's depending on what we are talking about. However, there is one cornerstone in the building blocks of life that I discovered at an early age, it's my mantra, I use it daily; "Never let your mouth write a check your ass can't cash". Now most people familiar with that phrase take it to mean don't run your mouth unless you are prepared to back it up , prob